Should kids be allowed to have a vote in major family decisions?

I coach many kids and I give them all a vote on how we run our team. Ultimately the coaches make the final choice but the kids like having input. Should kids have the same input when deciding on family things like moving, school changes, major furniture purchases? Does it prepare them to be adults or are they being taught to be equals to adults? Let me know..doing a little research here....Should kids be allowed to have a vote in major family decisions?
I think the opinion of kids is very important and should be considered in a major family decision. I mean ultimately, only the parents can decide whether or not to move or change kids schools, but they need to take into account how that decision will affect their children.



As far as furniture purchases and things, my kids always go with us (mostly because I hate the idea of leaving them with a babysitter.) so they do have some say in what we buy. Generally we usually come to a consensus, but if we don't that ok (my husband would kill me if I bought a pink sofa like my daughter wanted! hehe). Generally speaking though, we ask our kids if they like something that we plan on purchasing, and if they don't then WHY don't they like it. I think it helps us get a better understanding if what will be best for our family, and also helps their cognitive thinking skills.



And by the way, What's wrong with seeing kdis as equals? I mean, I'm not going to let my kids stay home alone of cook a meal or anything like that, but I do believe that they deserve the same amount of respect and consideration that adults do. After all, everyone is equal. Just because you have a boss, does that make him better than you? I don't think so. I think kids should be treated as equals and given the respect and consideration that they deserve. After all, they give you respect and love, why not return the favor?Should kids be allowed to have a vote in major family decisions?
maybe a little.as long as they are respectful and listen to their parents.
yes i believe you should let the kids have a say in what happens in family decisions. as long as they are aware that the final decision is the parents. and you never know they may have a different view than yours and it might be really good. plus i feel it helps them developed for when they are an adult and have to make hard decisions.
My parents always asked our opinion.Not that it made much difference.But we felt like we were helping.
Yes and no. A team and a family might have some points in common, but it's not a fantastic analogy.



Parents are probably trying to make the best decision for their families (children included) when deciding on certain matters. Parents should discuss the issues with their children, but allowing a child to dictate and choose a decision such a decision as the family moving to another state to take a better job might not be the best time for a child to excercise their equality. Certain decisions need to be made for the family as a whole, not just for ';the children'; (thus society's ';Child King'; problem.)



As for furniture purchases, again that depends. If it's for their rooms, their input is normal and as isn't a life altering decision I would say ';why not?'; with the exception that their choice is reasonable.



Even for the family car, maybe the child could give their color preference -- a blue car over a red car, but asking them what brand of car or even the choice of two cars that differ greatly in gas mileage and how much power might not be within their comprehension level.



Sometimes allowing children to make their own decisions AND live with the consequences (without an adult fixing the problem) are better lessons than allowing them to influence all major family decisions.
Yes. Children should be asked to vote. This surves the following purposes:

1. The childred become independent.

2. They start to think and would encounter a similar situation in future in a batter way.

3. The children gain confidence because they realise that they too have a say in the family.

4. The children associate voting with responsibility and are careful of doing things that might bring a bad name to the family as a whole.

5. The decisions that the children take are their independent decisions. They can't blame the parents later.



Having said that, children are children so they should not be the ';veto powers.'; They should have their say and things should be done in their best interest. This should be explained to them.

Hope this helps. Merry Christmas!
Your right good for you on letting the kids have there say!

Kids are people too,and like you say ultimately you guys make the decisions....

The bottom line is kids are just small versions of us,

BUT you treated them as people,that alone is one of the best learning experience you can give them.

If they grow up with the confidence you are giving to them now by allowing them to have their say,or their feeling

Well basically how do you feel when you have been shown respect?
They definately should have some input, afterall, they are part of the family.
I came from a family that expected you just trust their judgement and do as they said. However I like to give my children options but not in the way that they rule the roost. It also depends on their age as to what you allow them to partake in.



I think children should be considered in major decisions as what you do affects their life also. However as you said, mum and dad get final say. I wouldn't let them dictate where we moved to but things like which schools they like and what furniture they want for their rooms has a huge impact on their life, that of course you want to know how they feel about it.



We are having another baby and our older child has already told us what names she likes and I tell her that I will listen to any name suggestions she has but at the end of the day mummy and daddy will make the final decision. Little things like that boost their confidence and self esteem and does help them to be better adults and decision makers.



Giving children options (within reason and supervision) and allowing them to make mistakes, makes them better adults.
pending on there age and ability to make the right choice yes i think so but in the end it is up to the parent
Well, if a parent is getting a new job and the family is being transferred to another location, then, no, the kids really can't say yay or nay about it. The new job can mean more stability, and ultimately it's up to the parents to make that decision.



There are smaller decisions that the kids can be a part of -- the furniture purchase would be something to consider having them be involved in, as long as they are old enough to make a rational decision.
I think thier opinion should be considered in the overall decision making of the parents. Considered only - the parents must decide what is best for the whole family not just one child.
I feel the kids should have input...i mean its there family too, but I think certain decisions are out of there control,ie. if my husband has a job transfer arn't really open for discussion. we understands the kids wont want to move, but if they learn to be flexible as kids that will help them as adults. as fars as if we get a new sofa we might ask them do u like this color or this one.
It depends on what age. I mean asking a 5 year old for input is really useless.



I would say that anything over 10 should be involved with big family decisions. And teenagers should definatley know whats going on in the family.



I think it makes it easier for them to understand why certain things they can and can not have if for example they know the family sitution. It makes them more prepared to deal with their own futures. But i do not believe in un necessarily burdening them with too much adult stuff either.
I don't think so. There's a reason adults are the heads of households -- they have the most life experience and are therefore the most able to make these important decisions. Children's role is to learn by the examples of their parents, and when they become adults, they can have the same privileges and responsibilities.
No, not a good idea, they need to learn good decision-making skills by observing adults performing well, not by being an actual part of it themselves. It's critical that you don't teach children that the world revolves around them, that their preferences are tantamount in all decisions. That's not even the nature of reality in adulthood, so why teach them it is in childhood?
Kids should have input into anything major. Calling it a vote however puts it on an equal basis. For instance, parents lose their jobs, can't afford the home they are in, the 5 kids vote to stay where they are.... obviously mom and dad just got out voted, but the reality of the situation is that a move is necessary.



Input yes, vote no.
i disagree with the majority. it's fine to give kids input, but not a ';vote'; on things that they still have no basis for evaluating. sure, i'd consider the impact on my kid of moving to a new school or new state, and I'd even ask their opinions if they were more than 5 or so, but i wouldn't give them a ';vote';. a kid is not going to ';vote'; based on whether the family is going to have enough money to put dinner on the table if they don't take the new job; they're going to vote based on whether the new house is blue or red or whether there were a lot of squirrels in the yard when you visited. kids are focused on the short-term. adults are much better positioned to evaluate the things that will serve the child's long-term interest. ultimately that should prevail when making major family decisions.



i once witnessed a conflicted mom asking her 2-year-old if she thought her mommy and daddy should make her a brother or sister. it wasn't an idle question, either ... apparently the kid was the tie-breaker between the spouses. give me a break! how would a 2-year-old without a sibling (or even with one) have any basis for knowing if they'd want a sibling or not?? that's an adult decision (for which, among other things, you take into account how it will impact the 2-year-old).



let little kids decide if they're going to wear the blue shirt or the green one, play blocks or play trains, take soccer or gymnastics. let the adults make the adult decisions (in the best interests of their kids).
Depending on their ages, I think it would be imperative that children be involved in some of the decisions. Moving, for example is a prime decision because it allows them to tell you how they feel about the move. Make a list of pros and cons, that way it may be something to look forward to and not dread. As for school changes, same thing applies, deciding on the school teaches them about choices. I would like to think that involving children in some of the decisions would prepare them for adulthood. As for major furniture purchases, that would be up to you, if you feel that they are ready and mature enough for helping in those areas, go for it.
No not a vote in the decision but defiantly a full discussion on it where we are asking their opinions and thoughts on it and we let them know we take their feelings into account. We just moved to Europe and had many of these with our children over this move. I do not think that we are treating them as adults but teaching them to think things out as they see the process of making big decisions. It also empowers them which is very good for children you would be surprised at the issues that come from children feeling small, unimportant, unheard, and powerless. It is always in their best interest to participate in big decisions even if they do not have an actual vote, knowing they are being heard is enough.
My kids get to let us know what they think %26amp; we try to make decisions that leave everyone feeling satisfied. But, the adults always have the final say in all decisions.
Depends on how major. In choosing the family dog, yes. In deciding family financial matters their opinion matters but the parents make the final decision.
Not furniture, unless it is for their room. They can have input on moving and school changes, but not the final decision. This advice also depends on how old your kids are. If they are teens, definitely let them voice their opinions and give them your reasons for a major family change. Not only will they be more cooperative, but you could get some valuable input for your decision making.
Yes, they should. I believe that if something affects the kid, they ought to be able to have a say in the matter. In the end it IS the parent's decision, but the kids should at least have some input.
Yes i think kids should have a vote or input in family decisions. IE where to go on vacation, whats for dinner, what to wear when you do the family picture, definatly furniture purchases.



As far as moving and school changes no, i dont agree there. Those are desisions left to the adults who are actually paying those bills, and school changes have to flow with the home unless there is an issue at the current school.



Yes i do think it helps children to develope their critical thinking skills, i think that ie helps them learn what they will be faced with as an adult.
yes,they are part of the family.for some decisions kids shouldnt have choices like if the family is moving or not because usually you are moving for a good reason.for thinks like buying furniture you can ask what they like best.i think letting them make decisions will help them when they are adults.
yea kids do have the right to vote as well as an adult they are human and sometimes kids make more sence then adults i fully suport what you are doing by treating them human.
yes
They should be consulted, but not have voting rights per se. The discussion should include financial considerations, as that makes kids more aware of things like budgets.

Too many parents make such decisions, then spring them on the kids with no warning. That is wrong and unfair.